Dems and GOP Come Together to Celebrate Big Fundraising Opportunity
In a historic twist, Democrats and Republicans put aside any animosity for each other and joined arms as the Trump verdicts spurred unexpected fundraising opportunities. At a bipartisan gala, both parties toasted to a rare unity, capitalizing on the heightened...
Millions of MAGA Voters Will Infest Country Later this Fall
Millions of MAGA Idiots are expected to swarm across the USA late this fall to vote, creating a natural spectacle that occurs only once every 4 years. Scientist expect between 74 and 75 million idiots will converge to vote in numbers never seen before. These...
MAGA Republicans Cite the Rising Cost of Kool-Aid As Primary Inflation Indicator
MAGA Republicans have highlighted the increasing cost of Kool-Aid as a primary indicator of inflation, emphasizing its impact on everyday Republicans. At a recent rally, prominent MAGA figures argued that the popular drink's price surge from 64¢ to 74¢ exemplifies...
LOCAL
HOA Issues Rule Stating That Screams Of Torture Victims Must End By 10:00PM
In a controversial move, the Vegas Green Desert Homeowners Association (HOA) issued a new rule mandating that any audible screams, presumed to be from torture victims, must cease...
UNLV Campus Protestors Taking a Break At Roberto’s Taco Shop
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MGM Resorts Celebrates Bring Your Bowel Movement To Work Day
MGM Resorts rolled out the red carpet for a special occasion, "Bring Your Bowel Movement to Work Day," celebrating the bond between employees and shitatic dumps. The resort...
New LA to LV Bullet Train To Stop At Barstow In-N-Out Burger
The In-N-Out Burger in Barstow, CA, announces plans for a drive-through tailored specifically for the Brightline West Bullet Train. The innovative design aims to offer passengers...
Rio Hotel Secretly Wishes It Was The Hotel That Was Closing Down
With the recent closing of the iconic Tropicana Hotel, the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas could only quietly wish it could have been the one bidding farewell this week. While the...
North Las Vegas Proposes Name Change To Gus
North Las Vegas has surprised many with a proposal: a name change to "Gus." Spearheaded by Mayor Pamela Goynes-Brown, the initiative aims to redefine the city's identity,...
NATIONAL
Millions of MAGA Voters Will Infest Country Later this Fall
Millions of MAGA Idiots are expected to swarm across the USA late this fall to vote, creating a natural spectacle that occurs only once every 4 years. Scientist expect between 74 and 75 million idiots will converge to vote in numbers never seen before. These...
Mass Shooting Industry Praises Supreme Court Decision
In a landmark ruling that has sent shockwaves through the mass killing world, the US Supreme Court has struck down the reasonable Trump-era regulation against bump stocks, much to the jubilation of mass murder aficionados nationwide. The Mass Murderers Association of...
Dems and GOP Come Together to Celebrate Big Fundraising Opportunity
In a historic twist, Democrats and Republicans put aside any animosity for each other and joined arms as the Trump verdicts spurred unexpected fundraising opportunities. At a bipartisan gala, both parties toasted to a rare unity, capitalizing on the heightened...
MAGA Republicans Cite the Rising Cost of Kool-Aid As Primary Inflation Indicator
MAGA Republicans have highlighted the increasing cost of Kool-Aid as a primary indicator of inflation, emphasizing its impact on everyday Republicans. At a recent rally, prominent MAGA figures argued that the popular drink's price surge from 64¢ to 74¢ exemplifies...
SPORTS
Mystic Dan Ashamed of Christian MAGA Beliefs
After clinching victory in the Kentucky Derby, Mystic Dan grapples with a profound internal conflict. Despite basking in the glory of his triumph, he's unable to revel in the...
William Karlsson Outlines Golden Knights Strategy to Win Playoffs
Don't Lose
Unknown LV Pro Lacrosse Team Surprised There Is An Unknown LV Pro Volleyball Team
In a stunning discovery, the Las Vegas Desert Dogs, a professional lacrosse team that nobody knows about has just been blindsided by the revelation of another obscure team in...
Alabama Late Surge inspired By Coach’s Promise of Pizza Party
Alabama Late Surge Inspired by Coaches Promise of Pizza Party At a timeout with only a few minutes to go, the Alabama coach promised the boys that if they won, he'd throw them a...
